Laughter Is Good Medicine:
The Golden Years are more "golden" for some
than others - but we are all headed along that same path so we really do need
to approach life's little foibles with a sense of humor rather than a sense of
tragedy... Besides, growing older is not for sissies!
Here are some cute jokes we have collected for
An elderly gentleman had
serious hearing problems for a number of years.
He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of
hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%.
The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor
said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can
The gentleman replied, "Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just sit around
and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three times!"
Two elderly gentlemen from a
retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the
other and said: "Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and
pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?"
Slim said, "I feel just like a newborn baby."
"Really!? Like a newborn baby!?"
"Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants."
A senior citizen said to his
eighty-year old buddy:
"So I hear you're getting married?"
"Do I know her?"
"This woman, is she good looking?"
"Is she a good cook?"
"Naw, she can't cook too well."
"Does she have lots of money?"
"Nope! Poor as a church mouse."
"Well, then, is she good in bed?"
"I don't know."
"Why in the world do you want to marry her then?"
"Because she can still drive!"
Three old guys are out
First one says, "Windy, isn't it?"
Second one says, "No, it's Thursday!"
Third one says, "So am I. Let's go get a beer."
A man was telling his neighbor,
"I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's
state of the art. It's perfect."
"Really," answered the neighbor. "What kind is it?"
Morris, an 82 year-old man,
went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, the doctor saw Morris
walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. A couple of days
later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You're really doing great, aren't
Morris replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be
The doctor said, "I didn't say
that. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful.'"